Where are all my pink flamingos?

I noticed this morning in the shower that I have lost my bikini line. I have no idea why loosing my bikini line made me think of a line from an old Jeff Foxworthy skit for the title of this post, but it did and so I went with it. It’s possible that I have also lost my marbles. Now back to my line. I know I should start looking where I last left it, but I don’t remember putting it anywhere new. I’ve kept it pretty much in the same place for 31 years! Unlike my hip bones my bikini line was there just two days ago. I know this because I remember checking just to make sure. I could see my hip bones disappearing almost right away and I knew they would eventually disappear completely. It used to bug me that my hip bones stuck out further than my stomach – almost like shelves. I always thought I looked like a starved cow with my bones poking out everywhere, but now I want them back. I hope I’ll be able to see them again after all this. And another thing, where did all these blood veins come from? They aren’t bulging – They aren’t varicose veins, but damn these blue lines are all over the place!

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