My birth plan

In the first draft of my birth plan I had a lot of environment comfort things listed for myself. Like being able to wear my own clothes and eat during labor. I found out after going on the birth center tour that me eating solid foods during labor just isn’t going to happen and that it’s probably better if I wear their clothes until after delivery. The nurse on the tour explained that the IV stuff is inserted just so they can easily have access if they need it and I’m all about trying to be prepared for emergencies, so I’ve decided that an IV is ok. Then there are other things I wanted that are part of normal procedure like not having a Cesarean unless necessary and not being separated from Kurt. Therefore, many of those things I removed. Some things I added that I just learned about like my preferences on all the things that are done to the newborn such as the applying eye goop and administering a vitamin K shot, which I learned about in, Pregnancy Childbirth and the Newborn: The Complete Guide.

ATTENDANTS
I only want the required doctors, nurses, and Kurt in the room. I didn’t have an audience while conceiving the child and I certainly don’t want that many witnesses to Kurt’s execution when I’m pushing out baby melon-head.

MY ENVIRONMENT

• I prefer dim lighting
• I would like to be able to walk around as I choose

FAIR WARNING TO NURSING STAFF
I don’t mind being comforted during labor; however, I have a freakishly strong death grip when I’m in pain and I don’t let go. Do not take my hand unless you want to know what it looks and feels like to have a complete loss of circulation in one limb with the possibility of some bones crushing. If you think I’m joking or exaggerating, take your cues from Kurt and watch where he stands each time I get a pained look on my face. - He knows!

LABOR

• I wish to be able to move around and change position at will throughout labor
• Even if I am fully dilated, and assuming the baby is not in distress, I would like to wait until I feel the urge to push before beginning the pushing phase
• I’d like a nurse to support my legs when I push
• I’d like to be able to try any position comfortable during pushing
• I do not want time limits on laboring and prefer labor not to be augmented unless medically necessary
• Please do not hand the baby to me until she’s been cleaned up / wrapped in a blanket

ANESTHESIA – PAIN MEDICATION

• I would prefer to *try* laboring without pain medication
• If I decide I want medicinal pain relief, I’d prefer an epidural

EPISIOTOMY

• I would rather risk *some* tearing than to have an episiotomy

MONITORING

• I do not want an internal monitor unless the baby has shown some sign of distress

IMMEDIATELY AFTER DELIVERY

• Kurt does not want to catch the baby, cut the cord, play with the placenta, or anything else that may involve blood, guts, gore, and other such squishy things. – Please don’t even ask him unless you’re prepared to catch a fainting 6’ 4” man
• I would like the baby evaluation done in my presence
• Preferences about procedures such as Vitamin K shot (I prefer oral doses be given), eye drops (not Silver Nitrate please), Hepatitis B vaccination (must not contain thimerosal/mercury)

POSTPARTUM

• I would like to have the baby near me at all times
• If it’s possible, I would like to donate my baby’s umbilical cord blood.
• I would like to see a lactation consultant
• I would prefer to breastfeed exclusively and I would like to feed by her needs/demand
• Please don’t offer anything to my baby at any point especially not glucose water or pacifiers
• If I am unable to breastfeed – plain water and/or formula are ok