I’ve run into a few people with very ‘normal’ names that made me think, “My GOD, did your parents hate you?” I know a couple Richards that go by their middle names because they don’t want to be called Dick. My grandfather was named Richard and chose to go by Dick. I’m assuming that when he first decided to go by Dick it didn’t have the meaning that it does now. I knew a guy named Shannon who hated his name and one named Lindsey that didn’t seem to mind his at all. I knew a woman named with a unique name that wouldn’t choose any other but have heard of some creative names that would just be cruel. So even though I’m an advocate for freedom of speech, every time I’ve read a blog post about, “should parents be able to name their kids anything they want” I’ve always on the fence about it in the past.
I think the name Metallica would be awesome. Ikea is a little silly, but not offensive nor any more outlandish than Monk, Fulmer, or Knute would be in the US, the last three being traditional Scandinavian names for boys. I was a little put off by Penn Jillette naming his daughter Moxie. I love the name itself though to me it seems more fitting for a boy, but it’s a choice for Penn and his wife. I really don’t think Moxie CrimeFighter or her brother Zolten Penn Jillette will be teased any more than if they had been named Mildred and Loren. Both of those names accepted as ‘normal’ names they just aren’t used much anymore. Loren is common for a girl’s name, but was once used for males. Kurt and I considered naming our child Darth if she had been a he. If Kurt had won out and if we had a boy, we would have at least given him a more common middle name in case he didn’t appreciate his first name.
When I heard about the poor girl from New Zealand who was so embarrassed by her name that her friends only new her as “K” I thought, maybe baby name regulation isn’t so bad, but a more recent baby name controversy has me leaning on the parents side, but only because Adolf used to be a very common and acceptable German name prior to one rotten apple.
Holland Township family angry that supermarket won’t personalize cake for their son
by Express-Times staff
Sunday December 14, 2008, 12:16 AMJoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell.
Good names for a trio of toddlers? Heath and Deborah Campbell think so. The Holland Township couple has picked those names and the oldest child, Adolf Hitler Campbell, turns 3 today.
This has given rise to a problem, because the ShopRite supermarket in Greenwich Township has refused to make a cake for young Adolf’s birthday.
Even though Kurt and I joked about naming our kid Adolf Hitler *Kurt’s very complementary last name* if she had been a boy. I’m appalled that someone out there actually did just that. Forget about schoolyard bullying. We are all teased for something growing up. It’s part of the right of passage into adulthood. Besides who the hell is going to fuck with Adolf Hitler or his siblings. I mean really! My concern for JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell and Adolf Hitler Campbell is that their parents don’t seem to realize using their children’s names to make a statement will seriously limit the children’s future college entrance and job prospects. We have laws against discrimination of gender, race, and religion, but nothing for unfortunate name recipients. And we all know that anyone with an applicant whose name is Adolf Hitler, weather right or wrong, is going to make some assumptions and have serious reservations against calling him in to interview, especially if the interviewer is having a very bad Jewy Jew day.
Between the New Zealand girl’s case and this one, I know that no one with parents this inconsiderate has a chance in hell anyway, so just as we do with other areas of free speech we must accept the bad with the good in order to preserve the freedom for all. If these people are bad parents and the kids end up in the middle of an abuse case or custody battle, maybe the judge will let the kids change their names. Sadly, I’m guessing they’ll be so brainwashed they might actually want their given names. They might even be proud of them. In which case *saluting the children* have fun with your uphill battle.
Wow. Just wow. Forget the name I picked out… if I ever have a boy, his name will be Bob. Bob Smith [Last Name]. Nice and safe and boring. No uphill battles for him! (And that brainwashing thing is totally likely… look at the girls in Prussian Blue.)
smarmoofuss latest blog post… Boggle Me Thursday: #5
Well I guess we have to choose a good for our children.
Baby- Names latest blog post… The Most Unique Literary Baby Names
He’ll just be picked on for having a boring name then.
*twitching at the thought of Prussian Blue*
I saw on the web a guy named Batman. They even have his driver’s license as proof.
Mercolas latest blog post… Too Much TV Can Make Your Child Obese!
Wow. I can’t even imagine thinking that is okay (Adolf Hitler). Weird names are one thing, and I certainly feel bad for children who have them, but being named after Hitler?! That poor kid. I don’t even want to think of what it will do to his personality as I sit here thinking about the research that shows the connection between names and personality. Oy!
Allisons latest blog post… Two Weeks From Yesterday
I realize with a name like mine, I may be a little biased. I think naming, like so many other aspects of parenthood, is a question of degrees. Go a little outside the mainstream and you’re probably OK. Different but not offensive or outright stupid naming choices can help a kid establish a bit of a uniqueness that might otherwise be lost. As a writer with a unique name, I thank the Google Gods every day that I have the name that I do. Even the low-level schoolyard needling when I was a kid helped shape who I am today.
But when parents swing the pendulum completely off the edge, the poor kid ends up suffering as a result. I ache for these children, for whatever “message” their parents wanted to send will be forever lost on anyone who encounters them.
And as someone whose family is logarithmically smaller because of the actions of the hatemongers for whom these children are named, I would probably have difficulty restraining myself if I ever met these poor excuses for parents. There really oughta be a law.
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Metallica!?! Don’t give Henry any ideas. We’re having #2 in May and if it is a boy (We’ll find out after New Years) he’s threatening to name it Dexter after the Showtime series. I can just hear someone calling the kid dixter. If it’s a girl he likes Gissele. I can just hear people calling her jizz. Don’t pretend you don’t know what jizz is
I used to like Aiden until someone I know told me that the name will break down into Gayden. I have to admit, there is a fine line between wanting a unique name and traumatizing your child with a lifelong curse. I do like Sophia, but that’s already taken…:)
Mercola – Whoa, Batman is a name that’s further outside the box than I’m willing to go with a kid’s name, but if he likes it that’s really cool. I don’t think it’s a cruel name like poor Adolf. Thanks so much for the comment.
Carmi – If there were a law in the US how would it be constructed? I think the majority of us agree that the name Adolf Hitler is just wrong for anyone born after WWII, but not everyone agrees when it comes to names like Metallica, Moxie, Ikea, and Apple. How would we define ‘offensive’ names without limiting creativity? Is John Holmes ok? How about Michael Hutchence, Darth, Spartacus, Charles Manson, or Attila? And will the name Adolf Hitler still be off limits 500 years from now?
Allison – Yeah, I wonder if parents will keep their kids away from Adolf even if he’s generally a good kid just because of his name. It’s really sad for that boy. For me it brings up the question, would you want your kid to spend the night or even go over to play at a house with parents like that?
Susan Anderson – Congratulations on baby #2!!
Before I read your comment yesterday I had just been thinking how cool it would be if my loyal commenter and I were pregnant at the same time, seriously. But I haven’t convinced Kurt of a second child yet. When I read your comment I told him, “See, Susan is pregnant!”
I LOVE the show Dexter! But I’m on your side. I wouldn’t go with that name. Oh and we don’t actually get Showtime. We watch Dexter via Netflix, so don’t spoil anything for me.
I’m not seeing much difference between Batman and Darth. I mean, they both wear masks and black capes.
Angels latest blog post… As of Right Now…
Lol! We watch Dexter on DVD, but I’ve read spoilers. I wish I hadn’t. So here’s what I read… *mmph* …*uggrgl*…Wait, Henry doesn’t want to know either
I’m being silenced 
Susan Anderson – Oh I forgot to mention *eye flutter*, what’s jizz? *innocent look* hehehe of course I know what jizz is. I was in the Navy during the Clinton administration. LOL!!!
Angel – Batman has a gay sidekick and Darth has asthma.