Pregnancy and Motherhood Archive

My baby shower / Kurt’s birthday party was on Saturday. It was a blast! Kurt and I reserved a whirlyball court for two hours. I couldn’t play because I’m pregnant (duh), but I had fun sitting on the sidelines with two other preggos watching all these adults (including both of my parents) speeding along in WhirlyBugs (bumper cars) with hand-held scoops trying to propel a whiffle ball at their scoring target. After the two hours, we went outside where there were some tables, I opened the baby shower gifts, and Kurt opened his birthday gifts. For Kurt’s birthday present, I had found a website that I could search for pictures off Disney movies and have them made into T-shirts and other apparel. I picked the dinosaur off the movie “Meet the Robinsons” and had it placed on T-shirt for Kurt and a matching baby onesie. Then I took it to a print shop in town and had them place the one line from the movie that everyone knows from the Super Bowl commercial (or the movie if you actually watched it), “I Have A Big Head…and Little Arms” on both garments. Happy THIRTY-FIFTH Kurtie!

After that, we all went to Buca di Beppo. I can’t remember the stories shared, but just like at my thirtieth birthday it was leaked out that someone in our party was having a birthday so they brought out the candelabrum (Kurt’s candelabrum only had three candles on it though). The waiter asked which one of us was celebrating our birthday. I pointed to the birthday boy who, as usual, happened to be wearing the brightest shirt of anyone around. That night he was in his Kawasaki green shirt. Then the waiter asked the name of our birthday boy and one of Kurt’s coworkers called out “Kermit”. We sung the birthday song using Kurt’s new name - loudly. It’s not easy being green.

So, what have I been doing for the past week? On Wednesday the 15th, I noticed my first stretch marks. I’m so disappointed, but they aren’t on my belly. They’re on my lower back/the very top of my butt. I would say it’s just below my waistline, but it’s hard to tell where that is/was these days. I think the stretch marks are from my hips spreading, maybe? Anyway, they’re there and they’re ugly red streaks.

On Friday the 17th, I had my monthly doctor appointment. Sophia’s heart rate is still the same, and she’s kicking/moving a lot. I’ve gained five pounds since my last appointment. For those of you who have lost track that means I now weigh in at 165 pounds. I’ve been warned that at my next appointment I get to have a vaginal and anal swab for strep – oh joyous days. On the up side, he gave me some pills to help with the heartburn – YAY!! My next appointment will be next week and after that, I’ll have weekly appointments. I’m so scared and excited, mostly scared.

I know I haven’t posted in a while. I’m still alive (pregnant but living) and the baby’s still kickin’

On Tuesday August 14th I went to the “Feeding your baby” class. That was a great class. I learned quite a bit. It’s funny that the class is supposed to cover both formula and breast-feeding but that only about twenty minutes of the hour and a half class was about bottle-feeding. My cliff notes to that section are – follow the damn directions on the can. That’s about it. Oh and don’t hold a baby horizontal to the floor to bottle-feed. The baby should be at an angle as if he or she is being held up to the breast in order to avoid ear infections. Holding the baby at an angle helps keep fluids draining properly as baby feeds. Other than those two major tips on bottle-feeding, it’s the natural way of feeding that we all have forgotten about. The part of the class that we should already know about, the part we should have learned from our mothers, sisters, aunts and so on was what was most covered. That seems wrong to me. Not that bottle-feeding is wrong, just that none of us seem to know how our bodies are supposed to work anymore. Someone might think that the hospital I’m going to leans more towards a non-medical, home birth type of deal where no one uses medication during labor, but no, we’re just that out of touch with the natural ways of things.

Before this class, I kept hearing from various people that breast feeding hurts and that you get sore cracked nipples. I really want to breast feed because I also keep hearing how healthy it is for the baby, but how could anyone breast feed for more than a few weeks if it hurts so much? The first thing I learned in the breastfeeding portion of the class was that it’s not supposed to hurt (boobs and nipples will be tender the first few weeks but actual breastfeeding shouldn’t hurt), and if it does, it’s probably due to the baby not latching properly. The nurse facilitating the class taught us how to hold the baby and the basic way to get a baby to latch. She also went over what it should look like when the baby is latched properly, how a suckling baby should sound when properly latched, and how to detach baby from boob if he or she isn’t attached err I mean latched on right. She also went over what to do when breasts become engorged, how to reduce swelling (cabbage leaves anyone?) and what to do if they’re so engorged that the nipple disappeared and baby has a hard time latching.

A lot of the information the nurse covered was in the book, Pregnancy Childbirth and the Newborn: The Complete Guide, that we received in our childbirth preparation class. As a matter a fact most of it is in there. Some of the cool tips I noticed were not there, but many of those can be found in What to Expect When You’re Expecting, Third Edition. Thank you to the friend that sent me that book! Yes, I found it incredibly useful and I have in fact been reading it. One tip the nurse gave that I noticed wasn’t in either book (or maybe I missed it) was when you have a bad latch don’t try to pull the baby off! Place your finger at the corner of the baby’s mouth to break the suction.

Yesterday I told Kurt that I had a potato for lunch and I STILL got heartburn. He wasn’t fazed by this at all until this morning when he saw me baking to small-ish potatoes for today’s lunch. “You really got heartburn from potatoes?” Yep. “What else did you put on it?” Salt and some lime (I realize this may sound gross to most Americans but you eat corn beef hash, so you really don’t have a leg to stand on). I also got heartburn from eating a single banana. – Banana’s, you know, one of the first bland solid foods you give a BABY! Kurt couldn’t believe it. “Damn, you’re bland!” Yep, it doesn’t get much worse than that. We’ve come to the conclusion that because my stomach isn’t growing out as much as other women Sophia must be pushing all my insides aside and I just don’t have room for food.

I’ll tell you what Sophia you push my belly out to make room for yourself so that mommy can eat for the both of us; just don’t give me stretch marks. Listen to me; I’m playing lets make a deal with a fetus!

Last week I briefly mentioned the childbirth preparation class that Kurt and I took. This Saturday was the second half of that class and they showed another one of *those* movies. In both of the vaginal birth movies that they showed as the baby comes out they place her on mom’s chest. While both movies moved me to near tears at that very scene I still think that’s just disgusting – don’t they realized where that baby has been? For nine months she’s been swimming in her own urine!!

Kurt’s coworkers have been telling him that many of the classes are a waste of time. The consensus in the circle of his coworkers seems is to just take the CPR and feeding your baby classes, but I did learn some things that I think are helpful in the childbirth preparation class like how to know when you’re having the real contractions, when to head to the hospital, differences in pain killers, and what the hospital will provide during labor and after the birth. They gave us a book (Pregnancy Childbirth and the Newborn: The Complete Guide), but the instructor left it up to us to actually read it on our own, which is nice. She gave us the overview of many different things and the parts that I want more information on I can look up in a book recommended by the hospital vs. trying to figure out which website is really telling me the truth!

The part that didn’t help me at all was seeing those movies! On the first Saturday they showed a birth that was 100% all natural and on this Saturday they showed us one that was a vaginal birth but the mom had an epidural. They showed where and how the epidural is inserted, which didn’t seem as bad as I thought, but then there is the IV, the catheter (didn’t actually see that inserted – thank goodness) and the internal baby monitor. I don’t want to be hooked up to so much stuff. Wires, tubes such hanging off of and out of me - I’ll pass thank you. The idea of feeling so much pain isn’t incredibly enduring to me either. Just because I live with Kurt doesn’t mean I’m a masochist! – He’s an entirely different kind of pain in the ass. After seeing that movie I was thinking – oh I just can’t do this vaginally at all. Then they showed us an unplanned cesarean section. Using movie animation they showed where and how the cut is done, but even with mere animation – oh I can’t do that either. I’m sorry Sophia but you’re just going to have to stay where you are. Just keep on kicking around in there. Heartburn isn’t so bad. I can handle some heartburn.

At the end of the movie about the cesarean section the couple was shown with their now toddler and they talked about the experience. They had wanted an all-natural birth, but the baby was just too big. Somewhere in their background story the father made the comment that the birth of his daughter was the most important moment in his life. I didn’t see it and probably shouldn’t mention it, but Kurt told me later that… (looking around the room – sssshhh) he started tearing up a bit at that scene.

I still have not completed the first set of tasks I set for myself, but I did finish ¾ of last week’s tasks. I also made more food to freeze for Gandalf so that I don’t run out just before or too soon after Sophia is born. It wasn’t on any of my official to do lists, but since it’s about a four-hour process even when I’m not waddling around the kitchen like a duck I consider it a good accomplishment that I’m glad is now out of the way.

I made the after baby shower dinner reservations, the veterinary appointment for Gandalf, and doctor appointment for myself. I have not called the potential babysitter yet, but thank you Leendaluu for those helpful questions. I didn’t even think about asking who else will be visiting while my kid is there. I am keen on the day planning part though because I certainly don’t want to pay someone who will use the TV as a sitter. If the laws allowed for it I don’t mind if she sits everyone down to watch Sesame Street and/or whatever popular kids show for an hour or two, but beyond that I would hope there would be some adult interaction and play time.

If anyone else has some questions to always ask a new sitter that I might not have thought of, Please feel free to send them my way!

This week’s goal is to finish the goals of the previous two weeks (do you see the pattern here?). My other goals are to get some tamales made so that I don’t have to do much cooking soon after Sophia is born and have fun at my baby shower on Saturday!!

On Thursday I went to a teriyaki restaurant for lunch that I hadn’t been to since I started showing. I used to go their fairly frequently with one of my now ex-coworkers so the lady recognized me right away. She said she would be right with me as she passed by to had takeout to another customer in the dining area, but then she looked at my belly and stopped in her tracks, “OH, really?”. Yep I’m really pregnant. She handed the food to the other customer and then came back to me. She put one hand on my back on one on my belly, “oh my – when are you due? Is it a girl or a boy?” Normally I wouldn’t let a stranger just reach out and lay their hand on my belly, but she isn’t a complete stranger and she’s so sweet anyway. I told her it’s a girl and that I’m due at the end of September. “September? – you’re so small!?” Ugg here is the difficult part for me. I feel so odd that my stomach doesn’t stick out as much as others that are due at the same time I am. Even people that are a couple months behind me have bigger bellies. So far the doc has given me all thumbs up with where everything is placed, but of course I still have my paranoid delusions that something might be wrong. I guess I just don’t want to get my hope up too high that I might actually have a normal human child. – Ok between Kurt and I “normal” might be asking too much, but healthy. Can I have healthy? I told the teriyaki lady that she was due at the end of September, so my belly still had some growing to do. I placed my order and then she quickly grabbed a plate with some almond/coconut flavored wafer like cookies, guided me to a table in the dining area, and pulled a chair out for me. Odd – she usually doesn’t give people that are waiting any cookies. My order was done a lot faster than usual, but then again the place was pretty slow that day. She helped me out of the chair, guided me by the arm to the door, and even opened the door for me. She’s so sweet. I usually don’t allow myself to be pampered like that. I’m the type that generally likes to do everything on my own. I’m not an invalid after all – I’m just pregnant. As a matter a fact on Sunday Kurt had to drag me out of the kitchen and tell me to go sit down on the couch and take a break. I didn’t realize that I had been up and about doing various chores from 10am to about 6pm almost nonstop.

Last week’s goal was to complete the goals of the previous week, which I still have not done. I did remove some of Kurt’s stuff from Sophia’s room, but it’s now sitting in the hallway. I don’t really count that as much of an accomplishment.

I also added 31 blogs that I frequently read to my side bar under the heading, “Link Love”, but there are still a few things I’d like to add/change/fix/replace.

This week’s goals are to keep on picking away at the goals of last week and to arrange the after baby shower dinner reservations, make a vet appointment for Gandalf, call the babysitting referral a coworker gave me, and make a doctor appointment for myself.

The first one I’ve already done *Yay* and no it’s not cheating cause I say it’s not.

Gandalf has quite literally chewed off (not plucked but chewed) all of the feathers from one of his wings. Because he’s shredding and not plucking and because it’s limited to just one wing I think he may have an ingrown feather or some other medical issue. It’s hard to tell with birds. I’m just hoping it’s not some emotional issue of him feeling neglected since Kurt and I have to do so much to get ready for baby because I’m sure it’ll only get worse once baby is here.

I really have no idea what questions to ask a babysitter. I already know that she does take infants, but I do need to know if she’s going to be able to take my infant when she’s six months old. I also know that she is licensed by the state and takes DSHS (not that I need that but from what I understand it means she gets inspections more often). The person that told me about this sitter says that this is the only sitter she ever took her son to and that anytime she passes by the sitter’s house her now eight-year-old son asks to visit the sitter. - I really don’t think you can get a better referral than that, but I still want to go in with some good questions.

I need to make my next doctor appointment for sometime around the 16th and after that appointment I get to see the doctor twice a month. I’m so happy and scared that the end is near. On Saturday Kurt and I went to our first Child birth Prep Class and well neither of us wanted to see THAT movie. I swear if they showed that in high schools the days of teen pregnancy would be OVER!

Last night Kurt and I went through a tour of the birthing center at the hospital and I was happy to find out that many of my birth plan requests are standard procedure there. Unless I require a cesarean section I will be in the same room from labor through delivery and postpartum. All care for the baby will also take place in my room. Kurt will be able to be with me through the entire process unless an emergency cesarean is necessary where they knock me out completely. If for some reason a planned cesarean becomes necessary for me, Kurt will still be able to be there. Cesarean would be the only reason why I wouldn’t be able to stay in one room for the whole process, but baby still stays with me the whole time. There is still a nursery that is usually only available at night, so that I can sleep, but I’m thinking I would rather just keep her with me.

They have a very cool baby security system too. There is a monitor that they attach to the baby’s leg – if it’s removed an alarm goes off at the nurse’s station. If someone tries to walk away with a baby that has the security tag still on – once the person gets within three feet of an exit all doors of the hospital doors will lock.

Someone at the tour brought up video cameras – blah! That’s really the last thing I want to see blown up on my TV screen. My cousin said that for her deliveries they brought in a mirror so she could see the baby come out. It’s great that they do these things for the people that want that, but my thought is nothing beautiful has ever come out of my body before. I have never once wanted to put a mirror by my crotch so that I could watch myself poop. Nor have I ever wanted to reach down and touch it as it comes out. The evidence in the toilet is really good enough for me. From what I understand babies aren’t very cute in the first few hours of life and according to Kurt, “don’t look human until they pink up”. Therefore, I will be fine waiting to hold her until after she’s been cleaned up and the first pictures can wait until after that point as well – thank you very much.

In about 58 days people will be able to say that I’m a mom, and when people ask me if I have kids I don’t have to ask, “Do pets count?” I will have my own squishy pink vomiting poop machine. That’s right after four pets (one malamute, one husky, one cat, and an African Grey parrot) I don’t have any delusions of what it’s like to care for another being, yet I still want my own little devil spawn. I’m told “it’s worth it” and that being a parent is “amazing”. It’s not that I don’t believe them, but I’m just not feeling it. Yes, I cried the first time I heard the heartbeat, and it was amazing to see Sophia open and close her mouth during the ultrasound. She even stuck her fist into her mouth. The first kicks were a little weird. They didn’t even really feel like kicks. Maybe I just need to be able to hold her and see her face in person instead of on a screen in black and white because right now it feels like I have an alien inside me that’s keeping me awake at night with a lot of heartburn and acid reflux. There have been a couple of times recently where I felt very close to my growing parasite (aside from the obvious, she’s inside me). I mean emotionally of course. Will I actually become as attached to her as I think I should? Shouldn’t I already feel this way?

Today Kurt and I were playing City of Heroes and because I have no lap, the cat curled up on my stomach. Sophia kicked him off. Her kicks are of course much stronger now. A couple of times her kicks caused me to nearly jump out of my seat at work. In the evening, I’ll sometimes roll my shirt up to watch her roll around in my stomach. It looks like my stomach is Jell-O that’s been flicked – watch it wiggle, watch it jiggle. It’s somewhat gross. In the past two days, she has been into holding her poses. I don’t get to see an actual foot print in my stomach yet but when I push in certain spots, I can tell I’m touching some part of her.