Category Archives: Pregnancy and Motherhood

From the truly tasteless and disgusting to emotional stories that feel very much like heartburn squirming on a pitchfork this is my parenting journey from pregnancy forward.

Tie Me Up Purple Princess Dress

Posted on by

Occasionally Sophia will come up to me with a lace from one of her lace up toys and tell me, “Tie me up.” Really? What are they teaching you in preschool? Should I be concerned? The other day she did this again. She indicated that I should tie the lace around her waist. After I “tied her up” she went to her play kitchen to cook.

“Oh is that your apron?”

“Yes!”

Ah I understand now. They actually have the kids cook on occasion. I know that one time they actually had the kids make pancakes. They even poured the batter into the pan or griddle or whatever they use, which is one part of cooking I haven’t let Sophia do yet. I love her preschool.

Promoting the fairy tale of marrying a rich prince bugs me, but dress up doesn’t. Halloween aside, I never did encourage it the dress up bit though. I have a bunch of pictures of Sophia putting on my underwear (clean, fresh out of the dryer), using my socks as thigh-highs, and parading around the house in Kurt’s shoes or mine. That is about the extent of her playing dress up, so I was quite shocked when she came home last week on Friday (the 13th no less) and said, “I wear princess dress”.

“You wore a princess dress at school?”

“Yes!”

“What color dress did you wear?”

“Purple!”

The next day she wanted to wear a purple princess dress at home. We don’t have any “princess” dresses. Sophia and I went to her closet so I could point out the dresses that she does have. There is a dress I bought for Christmas pictures that she never wore, her dress from her three-year pictures, and a dress I bought her in Hawaii two years ago. I bought the Hawaii dress big so that she could wear it at home in the summer, but she never did and now it’s a bit small. The Hawaii dress is what she has picked as her “princess” dress, and she has worn it nearly every day since. It ties in the back to cinch up the sides. “Do you want me to tie it for you?”

“No.”

*sigh* Of course you don’t. That only makes sense. She hates the ties so much that she asked me if she could cut them. I told her no but then she came home from school one day with one on them in her hand. I guess she cut it off when they weren’t looking.

Taken on two different days this year…
purple princess dress
purple princess dress with green stripe pants
purple princess dress with green stripe pants

Purple Princess Dress in Hawaii

Sophia in her Purple Princess Dress in Hawaii December 2009

Related posts:

PBS Kids Special Effect

Posted on by

Sophia’s three favorite shows seem to be Curious George, Word World, and Dinosaur Train. I have no idea if her new found love for a recently rediscovered beanie type stuffed monkey has anything to do with her love of the show, but for the past few weeks, she has carried it with her everywhere even to school. One day I asked her what monkey’s name was, just out of curiosity. She looked at me as if I must had been living under a rock, “Dis is Monkey, momma.” I’m sorry, I should have known. I’ll hang my head in shame for the next thirty days out of respect for Monkey. She has also taken to wearing a set of the most hideous Paul Frank PJs. She wore the tops to school two days in a row. She wanted to wear the set, but I drew the line with the top. I’d rather her go to school mismatched, which is a good thing because she mismatches almost constantly, than to send her off in PJs even clean ones.

PJs to school

Word World has definitely had a special effect on Sophia. It’s a show where everything uses the letters of a character or object to create the character or object, for example, using the letters D-U-C-K to form the shape of a duck. Sophia’s favorite episode is the one where Dog mopes around the entire show thinking that everyone has forgotten his birthday when in reality they’re planning a surprise party. In one scene, Frog interrupts Pig’s cooking show to ask for a cake. Pig replies, “Oh I think I have a spare cake.” Pig finds the “spare cake” and then devours it. The cooking show director, Ant scolds Pig with, “No Pig don’t eat the cake. Share the cake.” Sophia loves that part, and before Pig even devours the cake she’s standing on the couch yelling, “No! Don’t eat da cake! No! Share da cake don’t eat da cake!” Kurt loves to use this to get her going.

I’m not sure which deserves more credit, school or Word World but Sophia now has a more in depth interest in letters and how combining them creates words that we all, mostly grownups, can recognize. A few days ago, she went up to our TV and pointed to each letter in the front, “T-O-S-H-I-B-A” she read. “TV!” she announced as she turned to me with a smile. Well, actually that’s the brand name. Sorry sweetie. She then went to our pellet stove, “X-X-V” she read. “Stove!” She announces. It’s so stinkin’ cute that it breaks my heart to tell her it doesn’t spell stove. That’s just the model of the stove.

Sophia did the same thing with Kurt when he took her to Wendy’s one day. She looked up above the door, “E-X-I-T.” She looked at Kurt.

“That spells exit. That’s the door we use to leave, to exit.”

“F-R-I-E-S” She read off the box of fries.

“That spells fries because it’s the box that they put the fries in.”

Sophia looks to the box with her chicken nuggets, “F-R-I-E-S. Chicken!”

Oh what a confusing world we live in.

Sophia’s other favorite show is Dinosaur Train. It’s a Pteranodon family that adopts a Tyrannosaurus Rex and uses a special train that can travel across time to take them to learn about other dinosaur species. Sophia has been taking the bus to school for just over a month now and every day is a struggle to get her on. Every morning she tells me she doesn’t want to ride the bus, and then she clings to me like a spider monkey as I try to cinch the seatbelt down on her. Thursday last week (May 12th) was only slightly different…

Sophia, “I don’t want go da bus.”
Me, “Well that’s how you go to school now. You ride the bus.”
Sophia, “I want to ride Dinosaur Train.”

Related posts:

55 Flash non-Fiction Friday: Sharing

Posted on by

A friend posted a picture of her son on Facebook. Sophia saw the picture, “baby” she said.

“Do you know who that is?” Sophia didn’t say anything so I continued, “That is Treavor. Do you remember his two older sisters?”

Then Sophia interrupted with, “That is Treavor. He touched my toys. Don’t touch my toys!”

Sophia giving Lukas his pacifier

Picture taken 5/21/2011 camping at the cabin. Sophia is giving Lukas his pacifier.

55 Flash Fiction Friday

Flash Fiction Friday is hosted by g-man.

Related posts:

Baby Squeezins: Diaper of the Month

Posted on by

With the baby squeezens rounds from my daughter, I often picked the biggest blow out or the smelliest diaper. All of the boy’s diapers are smelly, so those are hard to compare. The boy doesn’t seem to have as many blow outs and the ones that he has had have not been that bad. So this month’s diaper of the month was chosen because I mistakenly opened the diaper when he wasn’t quite done. Kurt said I should have taken this one with a video camera because the still shots don’t do the green poop bubbles the same justice. Taken on the 26th of April with my Nikon D60 for your high-resolution pleasure, I now present to you the bubbly green Baby Squeezins, the Diaper of the Month.

blowing bubbles

Related posts:

55 Flash non-Fiction Friday: Toe-may-toe, Toe-ma-toe

Posted on by

We searched the same name book frequently, as if a name may have added since the last viewing. Studying, evaluating, and discarding names repeatedly only to add it back again weeks, days, hours, minutes later.

“How about Henry?” I asked.

“Sure, we’ll call him ahn-REE.”

“Why not cut to the chase and name him Pretentious?”

Pretentious

55 Flash Fiction Friday

Flash Fiction Friday is hosted by g-man.

Related posts:

Odd Friends of the Animal Kingdom

Posted on by

I’m sitting on my bed enjoying my night away from the kids when Sophia comes up, “Can I go potty in dere?” Of the three bathrooms, she insists on using the one off the master bedroom.

“Yes you can use the bathroom in here.”

After she finished in the bathroom she spotted the cat next to me, “Can I get Bay-wee?”

“No, Bailey is resting.”

“Can I get on da bed?”

Knowing better, I said yes. Bailey took off into the master bathroom because the door leading out of the bedroom was closed. Sophia took off into the bathroom after the cat and I hear, “Dat is for you to pee in. Do you need to potty?” We don’t have a litter box in there. She was actually explaining the toilet…you know, the kind with water in it, to the cat. Please don’t pick up the cat. Oh please don’t pick up the cat.

Sophia came out of the bathroom and opened the door leading out of the bedroom, “Come on Bay-wee. Wet’s go downstaiwers.” The cat, without running, actually came out of the bathroom and followed Sophia as they both descended the stairs. Then Sophia says, “Dat’s good. Thank you for wistening.” *blink* *blink* *blink*

Those two have the oddest relationship of any unrelated creatures ever. Let me explain how their daily interaction usually plays out…

Sophia will get bored arraigning her toys in the center of the toy room or watching TV and go upstairs to find the cat. The cat is always easily found under the covers of the master bed. Sophia doesn’t have to look under the covers though. She knows that the lump is the cat and he knows that when he hears her stopping and saying, “Wah-er” as she roars like a lion, that it’s his cue to run.

She runs into the master bedroom roaring. I hear him jump down from the bed and run across the room, then I hear her run across the room. I then see the cat run past me and hear Sophia roaring down the stairs. They then run several laps downstairs and dart back upstairs. Occasionally the cat will lose Sophia the lion and I’ll hear, “Momma, were’s Bay-wee?” Other times they’ll both get bored and or tired and it just ends. And then there are times when Sophia somehow corners him and I hear, “Momma Bay-wee hit me. Bay-wee das not nice. Das not nice hit Sophias.”

With exception to the last scenario, Bailey seems to enjoy his almost daily exercise. He doesn’t generally run from her. It’s more like a brisk walk. I’ve actually seen him stop as if he’s waiting for her to catch up.

Tonight after Sophia got ready for bed she came to give me a hug and kiss goodnight, but not before she gave one to Bailey. He wasn’t sure if he should jump off the chair or see what the crazy lion girl was up to, but he stuck it out.

bonking heads with mom

Picture taken 12/14/2010 at a local Greek-ish restuarant

Related posts:

And Then We Knew It Was Really A Boy

Posted on by

I was still in my second trimester, but it was past the eighteenth week, which is when I had the do-you-want-to-know-the-gender ultrasound. We already knew the gender, but this lunch really confirmed it for us.

Kurt took me to a sub shop that he frequents for lunch during the week. I don’t remember if we had business in the area that weekend or if Kurt just thought that it would be a good place for me to try. I walked in the door not feeling particularly hungry. Not that they’re horrible but “sub shop” conjures images of Subway sandwiches, and that it simply didn’t sound like something I wanted right then.

I studied the menu, and hemmed, and hawed, which generally means I’m not very hungry. Kurt, knowing the menu, suggested something light like a veggie sub. That didn’t sound right to me. I scanned the menu and my eyes stuck on something I don’t think I had ever had anywhere before. It’s just not something I typically select. I dismissed it. No, that would be too filling. It sounded good, but no. I looked further and came right back to the item that first caught my attention. “I’ll have the Philly Cheese Steak.” I said.
Kurt was surprised, “Really?”

I nodded.

“Do you want the seven inch?”

“No, I want the fourteen.”

Kurt’s eyes got wide, “Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

I finished the last bite and licked the bit of cheese off the wrapper that escaped from when I still had a sandwich. Kurt just stared at me in shock, “Were you hungry?”

“I guess so,” I said as I became aware that I didn’t have a crumb left and Kurt had only begun the second half of his sandwich. “I guess The Boy wanted meat.”

Related posts:

She doesn’t understand, I don’t understand

Posted on by

Just before leaving for preschool one morning a few weeks ago…

“Momma, mah-key kag-roo pak-pak pwease.”

“You want monkey and kangaroo in your backpack?” I asked. She doesn’t have a stuffed kangaroo so I was confused and my repeating her request wasn’t just to have her hear the words pronounced properly and in a properly structured sentence. I was hoping for further information even though I never get it. I still hold out hope from time to time.

“Yes pwease!” She said happily.

“Honey, what kangaroo are you talking about?” I didn’t want to say “yes” to something that might not fit in her backpack or that I didn’t want her to risk losing at school.

“Yes pwease!” She said jumping up and down, “Yes pwease!”

“Wait sweetie, I don’t understand. What kangaroo do you want to bring? Can you show me?”

She began to get frustrated that I wasn’t just saying “yes” or “no” to her request and that her “Yes please” wasn’t doing the magic, so she went through her rolodex of canned politeness. She rolled her eyes up to remember how to say the whole sentence, “May have mah-key kag-roo pak-pak?…Pah-wee-ze!”

I tried so hard not to just laugh that I almost snorted. She didn’t understand that I did not understand what kangaroo she was talking about. She seems to think that if I understand the words that she’s using that I must also understand which of her seven hundred monkey items she wants. The child has about seven stuffed monkeys, a set of monkey PJs, flash cards with monkeys on them, books with monkeys. The kangaroo really stumped me. She has some alphabet flash cards with a Kangaroo for “K”, but that’s about all that I know.

“Ok fine, as long as it fits in your backpack.” I cringed. I also hope it’s not something expensive that might get lost at school. It turned out that she wanted to bring her “Brain Quest” cards. The cards for ages 2 to 3 have a monkey on them and the cards for 3 to 4 have a mouse which looks like a kangaroo to her. Whew! Yep, those can go to school.

brain quest

Related posts:

Building Amazing Abilities

Posted on by

Our new master bedroom is the same size as the living room in our old house. It seemed silly to keep the queen-size bed and sole nightstand of Kurt’s from the days before we even met…twelve years ago, so a three months ago we upgraded to a new king-size set. Kurt brought home the new bed frame and nightstands and with Sophia’s help he put them together.

Our three-year-old is scary smart and actually helpful. After watching Kurt put just one leg of the first nightstand together Sophia picked around the pieces for the 2 wooden dowels, 1 bolt, 1 washer, and 1 lock washer for the next leg without being asked. Not only did she pick out all the right pieces, but she also put the dowels in the right holes and had the washer and lock washer on the bolt in the right order. All this from observing it done once.

I’m sure she has repeatedly seen both of us build things with her Lincoln Logs when we play with her. I know that I’ve shown her a couple of times how the notches in the logs link them together. Nevertheless, I’m still impressed with her Lincoln Log house building skills. She’s three and a half and she even puts windows in her log homes. Seriously, I never taught her that.

Sophia's Lincoln Log House

This is the third house I’ve seen her do. The first one she used all the green pieces which are supposed to be roofing pieces and she called it, “Sophia’s new green house”. The second one she did, I really wish I had taken a picture of, had much bigger windows and no green roofing pieces. The size of the windows on the second house she did made it them seem less accidental than on this house.

One might criticize that her house is a little crooked, but I think she was simulating earthquake conditions to see how her structure would fare in such a situation. We do live in an earthquake zone after all. No really, my child is *that* brilliant. Don’t underestimate her. ;-)

Related posts:

It’s Like She’s Jackie Chan

Posted on by

Due to normal preschool attendance coupled with regular cold and flu season Sophia had a runny nose a couple months ago. On one particularly memorable day, Kurt asked Sophia to get some toilet paper so he could wipe her nose. She kept coming back to him with just one square. “No,” he said, “bring back about this much.” He showed her an amount by holding his hands apart a few inches. Still she came back with just one square, so he went into the bathroom with her to get her to grab more. I could hear him say, “Put your hand on top of the toilet paper roll. Now spin it.” Then he would sigh, “No, put your hand on top.” There was a pause where I assume he showed her what he meant and then he said, “Now spin it so you get more than one square.” I heard another sigh from him. Then out of exasperation I hear him say, “Have we not been speaking English to you?!” It was like a deleted scene from Rush Hour, “Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?”

Now I think of that every time I try to explain to Sophia where something is located. We have an armoire in the toy room. The top cupboard has a shelf with toys that have small pieces with I take down for Sophia by request. Under that shelf is a small TV and DVD player so that we don’t have to watch her shows over and over again. Under that top cupboard are a set of drawers, side-by-side. One side has things for crafts like scissors and crayons and the other side has some preschool practice books. Under the drawers is another cupboard where I keep things for Lukas.

Lukas has a mini blanket with an Eeyore head, which sounds rather sadistic the way I’ve described it but it’s actually cute and he loves it. Sophia was looking for Lukas’ Eeyore one day because she wanted to give it to him. I tried to explain that it was in the cupboard under her TV, but she just didn’t get it. She kept opening the upper cupboard, looking under her TV very confused, and then looking at me as if I had lost my mind. “It’s in the cupboard under the drawers.” I told her. Still nothing. Really, have we not been speaking English to you?

analytical girl

Picture take 3/6/2011

Related posts:

Page 7 of 50« First3456789101112203040Last »