Sunscreen Safety

Last year the when I viewed the environmental working group’s sunblock list their picks were based on the assumption that sun rays are worse than exposure to chemicals. (I may have been looking at their 2007 list last year since even in May their 2009 list isn’t out yet this year.) For people in sunny southern states this may be true, but for those of us in the rainy grey states, not so much. Last year there were news reports about not getting enough vitamin D, specifically breast fed babies.

In our baby swimming class some moms talked about letting their kids play in the sun for ten or fifteen minutes before applying sunblock. That sounds like a great solution except that the child then needs to avoid the sun for half an hour after the sunblock is applied so that it can be absorbed. The other shortcut that comes to mind is to just apply the sunblock and send them out before it’s absorbed, but with the highly reflective glistening oily sunscreens this can actually cause sunburn. It’s happened to me before.

My approach is to not use sunscreen if we’re going to be in and out of the sun for less than an hour and before 11am otherwise I just apply it. I’ve heard some promotions for wearing sunscreen everyday but I just don’t see it as a necessity here in grey-ville. Unless we’re out on a lake, river, or other highly reflective surface I think sunscreen on a grey day is overkill.

Last year I just grabbed a bottle of Aveeno Baby sunblock. It works as a sunscreen, however even if I don’t get any around my eyes by the end of the day they’re BURNING and it HURTS like HELL. I have super sensitive skin when it comes to cosmetics. I can’t wear makeup because I’m allergic to it. Eye shadow and many lotions burn my eyes the same way the Aveeno sunblock did.

This year I checked the environmental working group’s list again. (currently showing the 2008 lists) They’ve reworked their ratings to show which brands are effective against the sun and which have the lowest chemical hazard. They have a list of 140 recommended products and their top recommended brands. One of the top contenders is my favorite California Baby. I’ve had a chance to try it out a few times this year and it’s fabulous. It’s expensive as hell $17.99 at Target for a 2.9 ounce bottle but it works and it doesn’t burn my eyes.

Other links on sunscreen from the Environmental Working Group

• Sunscreens: How it Works, What it Means
• FDA has failed to establish regulations for sunscreens
• Misleading Claims
• Sun Safety Tips for Kids

At Sophia’s eighteen month checkup almost two months ago, she sat on my lap facing outward towards the nurse. The nurse commented on how big Sophia’s eyes are and said that she would be a heartbreaker, then chuckled and told me that Sophia rolled her eyes at the comment. Yep, I’m going to have my hands full. No doubt about it.

The Monday after her checkup Sophia simultaneously began the temper tantrum phase and the “I can do it myself” phase, probably catapulted by yours truly while attempting to put new shoes on baby-screams-a-lot. I bought her a pair of sandals in the hopes that someday winter will take a hint and acknowledge that it has overstayed its welcome, especially after the whole December flight travel crap.

Sophia seemed to love the new sandals as she spent the following hour after arriving home from the store putting the sandals on and taking them off again. Sometimes she even put each one on the correct foot, but all bets are off when I put the sandals on her. Totally unacceptable and apparently overstepping my bounds as a parent by trying to get her out of shoes she was quickly outgrowing. The child doesn’t like change. I blame her father for this. He purposely passed on those genes to piss me off-fa-fah.

I wound up putting her old shoes on that evening just so we could go out peacefully, and then it started. At a restaurant of all places. Thankfully it was a place we go to frequently. We placed a well mannered toddler in the highchair and without warning; this devilish contraption turned her into exorcist toddler minus the green spewing from the mouth. She rocked back and forth wailing as if we had permanently removed her callused thumb and told her she can’t suck it anymore. That’ll come soon enough, but I promise we won’t actually remove her thumb so put the phone call to CPS on hold for a little while. By the way, she absolutely loves her sandals now and will hang onto my shoulder and lift each foot for me to put them on or of course she’ll put them on herself.

We discovered that she calmed right down when I let her sit in the big people chair next to me. Seriously? She thinks she’s a big girl. She can’t see over the table and she drinks from a sippy cup, but she’s a ‘big girl’.

The next day was a sunny one and the beginning of swimming again. Oh what a relief! The pool was closed for the month of March for cleaning. I was so happy for some scheduled thing to do that I had a great day despite the little one throwing four separate tantrums including two in the locker room before and after swimming. All four occurring before naptime, and included her learning to bite me on one occasion that day. I think she hit the terrible twos at eighteen months. I guess the terrible eighteen months just doesn’t roll off the tongue like the terrible twos do. How long does this crap last anyway?

I need some scheduled activities to help me through the week, so I was happy to sign Sophia up for gymnastics which started two weeks before swimming picked up again but despite the age range listed on the catalog, Sophia simply was not ready for it. Gymnastics was too structured for us. Unlike swimming where we just recite nursery rhymes and encourage kicking across the pool interspersed with moms socializing while the kids from age six months to three years play with water toys, gymnastics insisted that for the entire time children from eighteen months to three years follow a course and listen to what the teacher says.

Through the course, there was a cushy red balance beam no more than six inches high. I tried to help Sophia follow the others but when it came to that spot, putting her on that was like trying to place a cat in a bath tub. She wouldn’t put her legs down at all and wiggled more the closer I brought her to it. She didn’t want to touch the red beam. She didn’t follow any of the directions and she basically just wanted me to carry her all through class. She did like the trampoline, but there was no, grab a toy and bounce on the trampoline with everyone in this class. They only allowed one kid at a time on the trampolines. It was expected that the kids jump while making their way across the trampoline and not linger while the rest had to stand in line and wait their turn.

Sophia is still learning to follow my instructions at home, “no standing on the chair”, “sit on your butt”, and we practice waiting our turn on the slides at the park. That is really enough structure for us right now, thank you very much. We will stick with swimming. Though my I think the nap time benefit of swimming is backfiring on me. She does take good naps but it’s also building her endurance. A couple weeks ago, Kurt and I went for a walk and the midget walked about three quarters of a mile pushing her own stroller.

The tantrums with biting went to the wayside after about three times. My only reaction to them was to yell, “OUCH” and not do what she wanted until she calmed down. But the tantrums continue and ignite with anything from not wanting to get dressed or get a diaper changed, refusing to use known signs or words to convey wants, and demanding to play with certain objects.

Yesterday Kurt and I went on a bike ride and insisted that Sophia wear a helmet. I think bicycle helmets are retarded but we have her wear one because she is up much higher sitting in a chair attached to the back of my bike than she would be if she could ride her own bike, and if I crashed, she would hit her head since she’s strapped in. Otherwise, I think they’re completely useless especially against getting hit from a phantom car that shouldn’t be on a bike trail anyway. In the few times I’ve ever fallen off a bike I’ve never hit my head. I have sprained a wrist but that’s it. I see whole families of helmet people all over. Dumb. And we saw a girl with her helmet family on a pristine powder blue bike wearing a helmet and knee pads. KNEE PADS on a bike, really? I wanted to run over and wrap the child in bubble wrap for her parents. Bubble child just couldn’t be protected enough. *eye roll* Apparently it’s beyond amazing that I survived my childhood because I rode my bike on streets without a helmet or knee pads, but I digress.

My little angel threw a fit as we tried to apply a helmet to her noggin. Secretly I’m thinking, “that’s my girl”, but we insisted. She stopped screaming and crying once I got going but she kept her grumpy face on for the five miles until we reached our playground stopping point, then she got all excited and was trying to get all the straps off to go play.

As long as there aren’t a bunch of rambunctious older kids on a playground Sophia runs to play areas and even engages other children. By engages I mean that she follows boys her own age and older girls. She also tries to politely play with their toys. One time a girl about six years old had a toy cell phone that Sophia wanted to play with. She stood next to the girl watching and then pointed and grunted, which is her own way of requesting just about everything. But if we take the child to a restaurant with a group of Kurt’s coworkers, which we do about once a month, she becomes clingy Velcro baby. She won’t even sit in a chair next to me or go to dad. She must sit on ME, and often times will curl up into a ball on my lap.

With some people, it doesn’t matter how often they come over to our house. Kurt had a friend over to watch motorcycle racing and all Sophia did was sit on Kurt’s lap and give him the baby evil eye from across the room. Sophia does do well with some individual friends though. I’ve gone to the zoo and other outings with a friend that Sophia actually let take her out of her car seat. Another friend who has a three month old of her own is able to get Sophia to laugh and interact with her. Yay for some toddler socialization.

At Sophia’s last two checkups, I’ve been asked as part of their routine milestone measurements if Sophia can point to her body parts. The first time I was asked, at her fifteen month checkup, I told the nurse that wasn’t something I had worked on with her. I figured I would start right then. She didn’t really pick it up until a week after next appointment, her eighteen month checkup.

Her first identifiable body part was her tummy. She happily discovered it after I stopped using bodysuits on her because the tagless stencils were causing a rash on her back. “Where’s your tummy?” On cue, and without formal training, she would lift her shirt and pat her belly.

Because of the short-lived fetish she had with wearing my shoes around the house her next identifiable body part was her feet. Then, her nose which she has renamed the, “Nuh-Nuh”. Next were her eyes. She really likes enunciating the long ‘e’ sound so she points and says, “Eye-EE”. Today I finally got her to point to her ear and mouth. Of course “pointing” to her mouth requires that her mouth be open and her hand or arm cover and uncover it while she makes noise, usually referred to as the Indian War Cry except in front of Native Americans of course. Ssshh don’t tell them the term is still used. It’s not as flattering to their heritage as casinos.

It isn’t fiction, viewed as disloyal by Union officers for siding with Virginia in secession Brig. Gen. Montgomery C. Meigs appropriated Robert E. Lee’s farm for use as a graveyard to mostly Union soldiers after the Civil war. His intention was to make the house uninhabitable in case the Lee family ever tried to return.

Flash Fiction Friday is hosted by g-man. You may also visit Flash Fiction Friday 55’s, a blog dedicated to hosting 55 Flash Fiction Friday posts.

Like many people who have to give pills to their dog I wrap Chelan’s in a bit of neon orange glow-in-the-dark American cheese polymer. I would never purchase the pre-sliced individually wrapped stuff except to serve my four-legged cancer patient her pills. It works like chocolate coating for humans only chocolate doesn’t cause cancer. This ‘cheese’ on the other hand…I think it would be worth investigating.

To accompany Chelan’s evening meal I grabbed a single pre-wrapped slice for pill prep. The unwrapping of the cellophane scared the crap out of the cat. He took off up the stairs not touching a single step. My cat can sense pure evil and he knows it’s embedded in this ‘cheese’. The next time the cat decides to serenade me at four in the morning I’m going to wave cheese in his general direction. Stand back! I have cheese and I know how to use it!

My cat is so stupid.

Kurt took Tuesday off work so that I could take Chelan, our 10 year old husky, to the Veterinary Specialist Clinic for an ultrasound. We knew this would be an all day event and I didn’t want to try and entertain a toddler at a clinic for hours on end. We weren’t very optimistic because over the weekend Chelan had stopped eating and we had to get creative by putting her food in the blender with a ton of water for a nasty doggy-kibble-shake. She still didn’t eat very much. I don’t really blame her it looked horrible.

In March we went from filling the dogs’ outdoor five gallon water bucket about once a week to filling it every other day. That switch happened practically overnight. She’s drinking about two and a half gallons of water a day! The only other possible clue that she was sick was back in December she lost some weight but she easily gained it back after I started giving her a little more food. Thursday I finally got all the results back. After several blood tests, x-rays, and an ultrasound they told us it started as a tumor in the anal gland that has now metastasized to lymph nodes just under the spine.

We’ve decided that she’s just too weak for surgery and chemotherapy. Jumping out of the truck, she would nearly hit her shoulder to the ground. Chelan’s usual vet chalked it up to arthritis but the specialist we were referred to confirmed for me that it was her high calcium levels that were making her so weak and affecting her appetite. She is on pills to keep her calcium levels down. She’s doing a lot better now but obviously this is not going to fix her cancer. We’re just making her comfortable.

On Wednesday, Sophia added another word to her vocabulary, “Bye”. She says it very abruptly unlike it’s antonym, “Hi-eeee”, which she happily says with a wave. She said her new word a few times outside of it’s context but alternating it with it’s antonym.

The next day she added another word. I picked her up from her nap and she said, “momma” before laying her head on my shoulder and sucking her thumb. She only said it once though. I told Kurt when her arrived home from work. He told me that on Tuesday, the day I spent hauling our cancer patient to and from the vet clinic, Sophia was grumpy so he asked her what she wanted. She answered, “Momma”.

“You really love her,” She said referring to my daughter. The inflection of surprise insinuated she either thought me incapable of love towards anyone or that she never felt that for me. I’ll never know. It’s clear we haven’t felt unspoiled love between us in some time, if ever.

“Of course I do.” I replied.

Flash Fiction Friday is hosted by g-man. You may also visit Flash Fiction Friday 55’s, a blog dedicated to hosting 55 Flash Fiction Friday posts.

The Kangaroo Climber is currently in the ground floor level room formerly known as The Dog Room or The Mud Room. Either were very fitting names. We kicked the dogs outside entirely. Don’t worry they have the worlds largest dog house, our shed, at their disposal. We washed the mud stain dog silhouettes off the walls and cleaned the floors six times. We also resealed the tile floor, and unlike most times when I say, “we” but mean Kurt, I actually did this stuff.

This room was the coldest room in the house so I wanted a warm color. We painted the ceiling but kept it white and then we moved onto the walls. I realized, while changing out the ceiling vents, that five years ago I put filters over the vents. I don’t remember those filters being quite so thick. They started out as paper thin pieces of felt. They now had about a quarter inch of dirt on them and two inches of dog hair above that. Nasty doesn’t quite describe it. After removing the ‘filters’ the room warmed up A LOT, but I stuck with the color I picked out. After applying the new wall color we started calling the room The Mexican Hacienda.

This room leads into the laundry room so we also took to calling it The Mexican Laundromat. While Kurt threatened to paint the trim purple instead of staining it, I threatened to buy a front loading washing machine *pause for effect* in teal. After moving Kurt’s computer into this room, and because of the room’s proximity to the garage, and a bathroom within the laundry room it is currently known as The Man Cave. The man still doesn’t do laundry. I’ve tried.

The man is greatly disturbed by the Kangaroo Climber and says, “it’s not The Man Cave anymore. It’s The Kid Cave.” *insert boo-boo lip* As soon as the weather clears up again (probably this weekend) Sophia’s new toy will go outside as intended. It’ll go next to the 300 square foot patio Kurt worked on for three or four weekends.

My second Mother’s day was very nice, except for the part where Kurt dragged us all down to go test ride a motorcycle while I tried desperately to keep a certain toddler occupied. We left the house late and hadn’t had breakfast so I came up with the grand idea of going to Ihop. We wound up leaving there without eating. Note to self, Ihop is fucking crowded on Mother’s day. And here I thought every other Mother got breakfast in bed. We wound up going to a Chinese buffet since it was so close to lunch time anyway.

After ‘breakfast’ we all went to “look at” a motorcycle. Sophia and I spent a good hour climbing up and down some stairs outside the condos while Kurt and the seller talked motorcycles and not just about the motorcycle for sale. Kurt finally took it for a test ride and I talked to the seller while Sophia climbed all around the inside of the car and into her car seat where she for the first time snapped the shoulder strapped together by herself then screamed because she couldn’t get loose. Kurt eventually came back, chatted more about motorcycles and then agreed to purchase this motorcycle. He now has FOUR motorcycles and he complains about my stuff taking up so much room in the garage. I have a plastic tote of memorabilia, another tote of doggy stuff, a bicycle, and the smallest chest freezer ever made. That’s it.

I told Kurt that for father’s day I’m going to drag him to Babies R Us or some other place of man torture not realizing how tortuous our next stop would be for him. I dragged him to Molbak’s, and I stuck him with the now very sleepy toddler. It’s Mother’s day which means I get a break from being a mommy, right?

I bought a bunch of starters, mulch, lime, and plant food. My cart was loaded with everything needed to start a small herb and vegetable garden which I’ve dubbed my salsa garden.

As soon as we arrived home I took off to the back yard and dug up a patch of grass that was mostly weeds and moss, filled it with about 50% mulch, added lime and plant food, and then inserted plants. So far they’re still alive. We’ll see how long that lasts.

In the mean time, the toddler was catching up on sleep and Kurt put together a very early early early early Christmas present from Kurt’s side of the family to Sophia. The Kangaroo Climber fit together like an easy puzzle, but since there were no tools or other sharp objects to contented with so I worried Kurt may hurt himself on all the rounded corners.

Click on the picture to see video of Sophia on her slide.

Note to Kurt’s side of the family: This video was taken right after her nap. She played on it all night long until around bed time and then in the morning forwent milk and breakfast to go downstairs and play on her new toy.