La-Z-Boy Laura vs. Ikea

For two years after Kurt and I moved in together we had two couches. One was his red leather couch, which our cat was slowly destroying with his back claws as he dug in for powerful lift-offs across the room, and then there was my couch. My couch was some black velvet-like 80’s couch with rainbow colored glittery pinstripes. Don’t laugh it was free! I promptly covered it. The cover for my free couch cost $50. You may laugh now.

Almost six years ago we bought our current house and soon after that sold Kurt’s couch because our living room was too small for two. We needed more seating so we purchased two Ikea chairs. About three years ago, we decided it was time to toss the free couch and buy a real couch both of us liked and that wouldn’t get destroyed by our cat’s jackrabbit impressions.

We probably went to every furniture store in the county and a few outside the county. We went everywhere! Finally, we went to La-Z-Boy. I always thought they only sold recliners and had cheap furniture. Not that I wanted something super ‘high end’, but I didn’t want anything that would fall apart after a couple years either. Turns out, I just don’t know jack about brand names and such. I absolutely fell in love with a curved couch and the huge ottoman in front of it. We looked at everything in the store, but I kept coming back to that one.

La-Z-Boy doesn’t refer to their furniture by model numbers. They use proper names, so anytime the sales lady heard me refer to *that couch* she would say, “The Laura”. “Umm yeah, that one. The curved one, with the ottoman.”
“The Tasha”

After Kurt sat on everything in the store at least twice, including the recliners that tilt forward to help old people back onto their feet, he finally agreed that was the couch for us. We picked out colors and fabrics for the couch and the pillows and then went through the process of completing the sale. One of the other sales people stuck up a conversation with us while we waited for paperwork.

Our sales woman to sales man: They’re buying The Laura
Sales man: Oh, are you buying a chair too?
Kurt: No, not yet, but once we see it with the Ikea chairs we’ll probably come back

The man looked like Kurt had just killed his favorite pet right in front of him and ate the heart.

Sales man: You’re going to put Ikea chairs next to The Laura?
Kurt: No, we’re putting The Laura next to Ikea chairs. We had them first.

If it hadn’t been for that exchange we would have never bothered to remember the names of our furniture. We did go back weeks later for a chair and bought the Farris.

This public announcement brought to you by a nearly seventeen-month-old Sophia.

This picture was taken in February. She is lifting a 1000g (2.2 pound) bar of Savon de Marseille, a French olive oil soap. I love that stuff!

I planned everything out. I did all the shopping the day before the hunger challenge began leaving very little wiggle room. I bought plenty of food. If I needed to I could get creative and still make meals for all day tomorrow with what we have left; however, there were some transgressions.

On Sunday, Kurt told me that one of his co-workers was leaving and therefore he had to take him out to lunch on Monday. Did I mention he wasn’t really into this whole challenge thing? I figure I bought enough for him for that day and he would not have staved so I was still in the game. He also bought a Coke at a convenience store, which brought my total up from $122.32 to $124.32. *grumble*

On Thursday, my daughter and I attended a class for her and a snack was served for the kids. I couldn’t turn it down nor substitute it for a snacks I had purchased for the week because one of the things my toddler needs help with is eating new things. Friday there was yet another class for her and this one was specifically to help her through some food issues, so again I couldn’t turn down the snacks.

Aside from the $2.00 Coke, none of those were really avoidable. What was avoidable was the caffeine fix I needed after my daughter’s end-of-class toddler-meltdown on Thursday. I spent $3.80, which would put me over our allotted $18 a day by $2.12.

If I hadn’t bought that mocha I could have purchased a couple boxes of Jiffy Corn Muffin Mix at forty cents a box to go with the Chili I made for Friday and today and still had eighty-eight cents left. But I didn’t have the restraint. I didn’t really want Jiffy mix anyway. I have a much better recipe.

I like sweet cornbread with some texture and whole kernels of corn in it. It took me years to find the perfect recipe. I finally found it in Peter Reinhart’s, “The Bread Baker’s Apprentice”. It is nirvana! I already blew it with the mocha, so why not? I went ahead and made my cornbread muffins. I don’t even know how far over that ingredient list put me over. Some of the ingredients I had from this weeks purchases and the rest I had in the pantry or freezer. All I needed was buttermilk.

She has swimming classes twice a week. I took her to the park nearly everyday this summer to socialize with other kids. You’d think such efforts would show results. Her peers string two and three word sentences together. I’ve yet to hear ‘mama’. If I’d continued working, keeping her in daycare, would it be different?

Flash Fiction Friday is hosted by g-man. You may also visit Flash Fiction Friday 55′s, a blog dedicated to hosting 55 Flash Fiction Friday posts.

I’m not in the mood to write a post but I want to stay in the NaBloPoMo game for this month. On Tuesday, I went for Sophia’s speech evaluation and it went well. Sophia participated and showed the woman evaluating that she does understand things and can point to the appropriate picture when asked to identify which kids are hugging. She also impressed the evaluator when I corrected Sophia, “I don’t think that’s a toy,” I told her, “put it back please.” And Sophia pushed the box she was playing with back to where it was on a table and left it alone without being asked a second time.

Most of the evaluation was answering questions about Sophia. I listed most of the signs and words that Sophia does and says, I couldn’t remember them all even though there are only about twenty. The woman administering the evaluation then asked me about Sophia’s eating habits. I couldn’t figure out why. I didn’t really want to ask either. I’m worried about what the woman might be thinking. I’m afraid of the label Sophia might receive. On one hand, it’s nice to have a label in order to help understand, on the other hand it could be like a self fulfilling prophecy as we adjust her to fit in those parameters more perfectly. My answer about Sophia’s eating habits, “it would be easier to list what she will eat” lead to further questioning about her reactions to various stimuli and a request to fill out a more detailed questionnaire.

I’m so relieved to be getting help for her and at such a young age. But I’m worried because well, that’s what I do best. I’ve been near tears since the evaluation. I’m watching me grow up again, and at times it feels just as painful the second time around.

Sophia of course needs speech therapy because she only speaks at the level of a 12 to 15 month old child, and because she’ll be receiving speech therapy we get to sign up for some of their classes for free. We may also get some help with her food issues.

Today I took her to her first preschool/play group and it went really well until the end. It was snack time the facilitator went around the table of sitting toddlers and asked each one, “which do you want?” It was a choice of fish crackers or animal crackers. Sophia chose the animal crackers, but didn’t touch anything on her plate the entire time. All the other kids finished theirs and then it was time to clean up and go home. We put Sophia’s cookies in a bag to take home and she threw a fit. Huge melt down, red face, screaming, the whole nine yards. She didn’t want to be held or comforted but didn’t want her cookies either. All I could do is stand there and wait for her to calm down.

Our oatmeal breakfasts and sandwich lunches are rather mundane but our dinners do have flare. Yesterday I made pork tenderloin that I would normally cover with a plum sauce I made from plums given to me, but we can’t use foods given to us or already in stock. So the pork tenderloin I marinated in soy sauce, cooking sherry, garlic, and brown sugar was eaten without the extra topping – still very good with broccoli and rice.

Tonight the leftover will be cut in half a used in Fortune brand mushroom flavor Udon soup (7.26 ounce noodle package from the refrigerated section $1.48). I’ll add some baby bok choy, half a package of portabella mushrooms, onion, and basil.

Day three of the pork tenderloin will be mixed in with Fortune brand Yakisoba stir fry noodles (7.7 ounce package in the refrigerated section for $1.98). This will be dressed up with baby bok choy, the rest of the mushrooms, onion, carrot, broccoli and basil.

Going into this I new that in order to stay within the $18 a day budget challenge for our family I’d have to stick to things that produce tasty leftovers and buy condiments for use in multiple recipes. This week has had a bit of an Asian theme to it so far.

Pork Tenderloin Marinade:
1 tablespoon soy sauce
1 tablespoon dry sherry or Chinese rice wine
1 tablespoon brown sugar
1 teaspoon sesame oil
1 clove garlic, minced

Plum Sauce:
2 pounds ripe plums
¼ cup honey
1 tablespoon ginger
4 cloves garlic, minced
¼ to ½ teaspoon cayenne pepper, crushed red pepper flakes, red chili paste (basically add heat to your taste or none at all)
¼ cup soy sauce

• Pit the plums and add everything except the soy sauce to a pan
• Bring it to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer until the plums are soft (about 15 minutes)
• Remove from the heat and stir in soy sauce
• Puree in a blender or food processor

Today is Sophia’s appointment for an evaluation on her lack of speech, finally. I reminded Kurt last night and he said to her, “When I get home tomorrow I expect you to be talking.” Imitating how she should sound he told her what he expected to hear. In a stuffy British accent he said, “Oh daddy, I expect your day was exceptional.”

You know how in cartoons if the character is baffled by the actions of another you’ll hear a tinny clinking sound and the character will blink several times. I swear Sophia did that. I think I even heard the blinking sound. “Are you going to say that when I get home tomorrow?” He asked her. “No” she said without any delay.

I’m taking the United Way of Snohomish County seven dollars a day challenge. It started yesterday. After signing up on the local United Way website a page showed with the rules including a set of more challenging rules, the rules that food stamp recipients actually follow. With the more stringent rules our family doesn’t receive $21 a day, we only get $18. I like a challenge, I’ll take it, but I’m finding that my biggest hurdle is getting my husband Kurt to join in. He’s having flashbacks to nights of liver and onions on the days just before payday. His family actually needed these services when he was growing up and if his mother reads this post I know what she’ll say, “I wish I had eighteen F*&#^&% dollars a day to spend on our family of four back then!”

The Rules

• You should eat breakfast, lunch and dinner, spending only $7
  per person, per day on food.
• Salt and pepper don’t count as expenditures, but all other
  seasonings, cooking oils, condiments, snacks and drinks do.
• Don’t use food you already own.
• Don’t accept food from family, friends, coworkers or others
  in the community. That includes free samples at your local
  grocery store!
• Try to include fresh produce and healthy protein each day.

Want more of a challenge?

• Purchase only what the Washington Basic Food Program allows. This means no fast food (including hot items from the grocery store deli), alcohol or tobacco.
• Participate with your family, coworkers or other community group. The amount of benefits changes based on the size of your “household”:

Household Size – Hunger Challenge Budget
1 $7/day
2 $12/day
3 $18/day
4 $22/day
5 $26/day
6 $32/day
7 $35/day
8 $45/day

I’ve made it my job in the last two years to save money on groceries, since I’m not bringing in an income, without compromising taste or quality of food. If I come off sounding like this is too easy it’s due to some practice. I’ve never actually done the math to figure out how much I’m spending over a week, month, or year, all I know is that I’m keeping the food spending in check by buying on sale, embracing certain store brand items, and utilizing the bulk food section. I don’t bother with hours of coupon clipping and didn’t for this challenge either. There are some stores that are just cheaper than others like Ranch 99 and WinCo Foods and have the same food quality as “high end” stores.

Fred Meyer has milk on sale every week. One week it’ll be ten half-gallons for ten dollars and the next it’ll be one gallon for a dollar ninety-nine. Normally I buy my milk, cheeses and a few other food staples at Costco. Milk there is always a dollar ninety a gallon, which is important to know for a family that drinks four gallons a week. Yeah I know, that’s A LOT! Buying in bulk saves a lot of money, but most Costcos don’t accept food stamps and we aren’t supposed to use food we already have. Also buying cases of food would put me way over budget for one week. In some ways, this would be a lot easier to do over the course of a month.

I never considered my almost daily mochas as a food item, so in my past grocery-cost bill-analysis they never made the cut. Though I have been trying to quit them for a while not because they are very expensive. I’m using this week to help me drive past the stand without stopping in for my fix. Our other major switch for this week is Kurt will be bringing lunch to work instead of going out, which means I have to get up at zero-crack-of-dawn-thirty to make it for him.

I bought oatmeal, raisins, and dates in the bulk section for breakfasts, and didn’t have to leave out the ever important brown sugar and cinnamon. I wound up spending thirty-eight dollars and eight cents on condiments for this week. Most of which will be used in multiple recipes.

Yesterday we had muesli for breakfast (I didn’t add nuts or fresh fruit), chicken salad sandwiches for lunch, and ‘Chinese Chicken’ with broccoli and rice for dinner. Today we had oatmeal for breakfast, ham and cheese sandwiches for lunch, and we’ll be eating leftover ‘Chinese Chicken’ for dinner.

Chinese Chicken recipe:

Foster Farms’ directions on this recipe says to cook in a dutch oven on the stove-top. I baked our chicken in a cast iron dutch oven in the oven at 350 degrees for about 1 ½ for a 3 ½ pound chicken so I skipped the bit about browning the chicken on all sides and just popped it in the oven with the sauce. I used a slice of regular onion instead of green onion and left out the sesame seeds.

Mixture:
1/3 cup soy sauce, regular or reduced salt
1/3 cup brown sugar
1/2 cup water
1 tablespoon catsup
1/4 cup dry sherry or apple juice
1/2 to 3/4 teaspoon crushed red pepper (optional)
1 clove garlic, pressed
1 green onion, sliced

Other:
2 tablespoons cornstarch
2 tablespoons water
2 teaspoons toasted sesame seeds*

1. Remove giblets, rinse chicken and pat dry. Heat oil in Dutch oven, brown chicken on all sides.

2. Mix together soy sauce, brown sugar, water, catsup, sherry, red pepper, garlic, and green onion. Pour mixture over chicken. Cover and simmer 35 to 45 minutes or until meat is no longer pink at thighbone.

3. Turn chicken once during cooking. Remove chicken to platter, draining juices back into pan. Skim fat from sauce.

4. Blend together cornstarch and water and stir into sauce. Cook, stirring constantly, until thickened. Spoon some sauce over chicken, sprinkle with sesame seeds. Serve chicken with remaining sauce.

*Sesame seeds need to be toasted to develop their nut-like flavor. Toast sesame seeds in shallow pan at 350 degrees for 10 minutes, stirring frequently.

Here is the United Way of Snohomish County blog. There you can see what other people are doing for this challenge.

Mid September I began taking water aerobics classes, and these are not the kind of classes you see all the little ol’ blue hairs talking in order to catch up on the latest gossip. These are real cardio workouts; though after the first class I was a little worried it wasn’t going to be the right speed for me. That was just the new season warm-up. I may actually be in a little over my head.

I’ve been taking Sophia to swim lessons consistently since she was about ten months and I’ve gotten used to the whole changing-clothes-with-a-toddler locker-room routine. In those locker-room moments everyone is chatting and it’s accepted that everyone is looking around while changing, mostly because we’re simultaneously corralling children while putting are bras and panties back on. Locker-room time after my aerobics class is completely different.

It’s been a while since I’ve been in a locker-room without a child. I guess I’ve forgotten the unspoken rules. When I dress at home I tend to look straight ahead because I’ve been dressing myself for a while now and I don’t really need to look at my legs going into my pants. That gets me some odd looks in a locker-room, even if my eyes are glossed over with a 30-yard stare and were fixated on a coat hooks beside someone. Whatever, I can adapt.

Not that I’ve ever been in a men’s bathroom but I get the feeling that the appropriate behavior for women dressing in a locker-room is similar to men at a urinal. Look at the floor. Look at the floor. Look at the floor. It’s a little silly considering after seeing them in a swimsuit the only secrets left are, how tight do they shave that bikini line and how big are their areolae. Neither are burning questions to me of anyone in my class. Really.

After my third class I was dressing in the appropriately coy manner with my towel wrapped around me. My chin was down to hold the towel up, which forces me to look at the lovely floor. Wouldn’t it be funny if the floor was a mirror? No? Posters on the floor would be nice. General reading material, I would even accept advertisements.

Anyway I overheard a conversation by three women in my class. It was a mother, her teenage or early twenty-something daughter, and aunt. I didn’t know they were related prior to the conversation but to facilitate my storytelling I’m letting you know ahead of time. Oh and I’ve changed the names not to protect anyone, but because I forgot them.

Girl to her mother: Aunt Faye says I should go to the doctor.
Mother: What for?
Girl: For the bumps with the bumps around it.
Mother: I told you to see a doctor about that a long time ago. Maybe you’ll listen to your aunt.

I’m not a nurse or a doctor, but for a place and time in which no one is supposed to look up at each other doesn’t this sound like it could be potentially embarrassing? Just for your information, none of this was whispered. It was said in normal speaking voices about three feet from me in a large echo-y locker-room, and I wasn’t hiding in a locker nor was I the only other person in the room.

The girl walked around a bank of lockers towards the exit but was still in the same room and if I looked up would probably be in my line of sight. I could hear talking but wasn’t paying attention to the words, then out of no where…

Mother loudly to the aunt: Are you telling her to use that wart remover?

Seriously, I don’t know how I didn’t just burst into laughter right there. I finished dressing and got all my stuff together to leave. Moving forward towards the door I put the straps of my bag on my shoulder and fished in my pocket for my keys. I looked up to scope out the exit route and passed right by the girl. Her left arm was raised and her right hand was lifting her left boob for her aunt to look underneath and both of them looked at me as if they just realized all this took place in public. Idiots.

I’m guessing the girl was titty-fucked and got an STD. What do you think?